It isn't easy living under someone else's roof when, for 19 years I have been completely independent. Ok, maybe not completely.... I have been blessed with a darling husband for most of those years! But I have always determined where things go, how things run, and when the goings-on of a house happen.
This is strange. Very humbling.
Lately TEACH has prompted me to really think about my relationships and how I approach people in my life... especially my husband. I can tell you that God and I spent some serious time together on Saturday. I had to drive around the block to find seclusion. He held me as I cried. He listened as I poured out my heart. And He answered when my sobs finally grew silent.
God reminded me that life isn't about me. It isn't about human effort or anything we can obtain. It is more about humility in adversity. It is about sacrificing of ourselves in order for God to be glorified in the moment. I was reminded...
Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus. (Philippians 4:6-7)
He spoke to me simply and said, "are you really praying about EVERYTHING?" God can give us strength through the small trials and the large. It doesn't matter what the situation is, even something as simple as, "God, please help me to speak with love" (When I truly want to yell in anger!) He showed me where I was more concerned with my human efforts and the results of those, than with what HE can and wants to do through me and submitting completely to His cause.
I am becoming like a steam locomotive now. No longer slowly chugging to pull away from in front of the station, spinning wheels as I work with great effort to pull forward. I am finally picking up momentum and while my pressure is not quite steady, the rhythm is developing and I feel confident that with God's grace.... and much prayer, my journey in this new place will soon be underway. All I will have to do is enjoy the scenery!
“Do everything without grumbling or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, “children of God without fault in a warped and crooked generation.” Then you will shine among them like stars in the sky as you hold firmly to the word of life. And then I will be able to boast on the day of Christ that I did not run or labor in vain.” (Philippians 2:14-16)
May you find momentum in Christ today as you pray through your travels (and challenges) in life.
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